Listen

Don’t speak, just listen. If I told you everything you wanted to hear, and took your fears one by one, rolled up and made them disappear like a magic, would I win your heart? If all I told you were lies masquerading as truths until the future reads like an obituary of the past and the lies have eaten away what's left of the present would you sing my praises, would you give me your love forever when I tell you how much this is lust and not love, like baby I saw you from across the room and just couldn't help myself...

Don’t speak, just listen. If all you wanted to hear were sugar coated words, carefully wrapped in colorful delivery packages, I've got them by the truckload, waiting to unfold at any moment that you desire. But what is love if but just a word, what is this life if but just a fleeting moment of existence. You see, Sometimes lies are more beautiful than the truth, so we wear them like pearls because that is what the world sees, like saying I love you but looking forward to those moments shared without you.  Like buying you diamonds but never really being there to watch you shine. These worldly desires are to be enjoyed but surely we leave them behind to inspire. If I could give you the world, what therefore would be left for us to discover….  

Don't speak, Just listen. You see, there's this feeling inside me. its like waking up to the sound of the ocean, like an invigorating love potion. Its like a refreshing breath of expectation, a never ending state of elevation. Its like being surrounded by commotion, but inside there's a sense of elation, devotion, inspiration. Its like trying to describe what loving you is like and realizing that you simply are more than any expression, you're every emotion... 

You should be the sound track to my dawn, your voice reverberating through my minds walls like a soulful renaissance of my being. You see when it comes to love, I need more than just a four letter word.  I need you to speak the words that deliver me from the weight of daily living. I need love like there is no other care in the world but us. And I will love you even when you lose hope, and I will always apologize, just to make that smile reappear across your face, because even though I cant give you the world you'll always have mine. And when I start ranting on and on, like I've just done, I know you'll sit there, smile and just listen. 

When we were kings

I was taught to close my eyes when I pray. It would help you focus, it would help you meditate, they said. So I did. I closed my eyes, in hope and in faith. We grew taller while we watched others fall. They had faith like I did and I struggled to understand why their story was different from mine. Did they not pray enough, did God not love them like he did me? 

When we were kings, there was nothing we couldn't do, we built spaceships with the dining table chairs, and soared through the stars with imaginary fears. Everyday our vision was painted on the blank canvas of our minds. Fear, faith, anger, love. I never understood the scenes before my eyes. My country had people but somehow it wasn't that simple, even my neighbors were to be seen as the others. Not another Nigerian.

We reached a place where we believed that this land owed us nothing, so we expected nothing.  That’s just the way it had to be. But when we were kings, all the words we spoke were the same, voltron was the one you dare not test and captain planet thought us to be the best. I've asked myself what it means to be Nigerian but in-between the lines that describe our identity; we've found an empty definition, one we can scarcely believe in.  Now we struggle for sanity in a society that has lost the ability to care. Nothing shocks us anymore, broken promises, broken dreams; we've grown used to it all. You see, sticks and stones may break their bones but tomorrow we'll wake up and hug our own, close our eyes and thank the lord that it wasn't anyone we know. They were just Nigerians.

When we were kings, I was taught to believe. That my dreams were not just a mere figment of my imagination. I want to believe, but it’s getting harder and harder to watch, so I slowly close my eyes. 

You see, I was taught to close my eyes when I pray, so I don’t get distracted, so I remember the things I want to pray for, just in case I forget, but how do I forget even if I wanted to. I always believed we could be better, but as our humanity continues to break right before our very eyes, we focus on acquiring more of the things we can’t keep with us when we go, then sleep with one eye open. Indeed, Fear lies beneath this confident swagger that we wear. We can’t look them in the eye on the street anymore, we see right through them, and get angry when the lens of reality show this lands true form.  We hide from the truth but they are as obvious as shadows on a moonlit night.

We all have our own versions of the same story. Every day like a different chapter. Every day we see their struggle, say a prayer to God to bless our own hustle and long for the days when we were kings. Back when, blinded by the light of hope we proudly recited the national anthem, pledging all to this land. To be faithful, loyal and honest.  But we grew older, and kings became slaves to the system. Many do not make it through the day, but we'll never know about them, they were just Nigerians.  Like you, like me.

A river of broken dreams

I stare away from her gaze, her mirror like eyes are too powerful for me to ignore.
When I was younger, and full of spirit, I would embrace her and sail away in lustful song.
In those days, moments were not separated by seconds, just one pulsating joyous beat.
Each one louder than the one before, more powerful than ever before.
Fluid movements each time we touched, like a symphony of dolphins, gliding beautifully across the waters surface.
I knew her, a time before the charms of the city lights had broken our song, and taken her name from my tongue.
I remember, she stood by the river, with the water gently touching her toes and the sun shinning on her black hair.
We had planned to run away together, arms spread wide like the eagle, we believed nothing would stop us.
One day she held my hand in hers, and dipped them in the water, now our dreams are one she said.
But even then I knew I would never see her again, kiss her soft lips or cup her face in my palms.
The sweet lies of love betray a stronger emotion beneath the surface, one of resignation to a feeling of helplessness.
I thought I was saving her from a life of disappointment, but that was simply a lie living within another lie.
I stood there and spoke of love, dreams, new beginnings, and pages turned in my mind but they were all blank.
Not the words though, the words bloomed like an uncontrollable release of vivid color.
Now when I close my eyes all I see is hers, and the tear drops that create a river of broken dreams.
Noisy streets bellowing like an evil wind, greet me when I open them.
I have driven my soul to the end of the world, the end of a line of mistakes and regrets.
Every dream, my entire being, feels lost, washed away by that same river.
I've turned to every direction, lost my senses in wild stupor and crashed into deep sadness.
This dirty mattress, I stole. my body, I've sold, still my goals elude me like fire flies on a dark night.
This pain in my head merely stings, nothing compared to the many battles I've fought just to keep looking ahead.
My feet are weary, heavy like stone. The harder I've struggled, the faster I've fallen down this hole.
Still, tomorrow always comes, and they say it'll all be better.
Tomorrow, after that beer, I'll do better, and save myself from this lifeless existence.
Then I'll go back and find her, standing there, by a river of broken dreams.

-Chiedu Ifeozo

Inside #NaijaPoetrySlam

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My feature on CNN's inside Africa

4 yrs since homecoming

4 yrs have already gone by since I wrote homecoming, and it still remains one of my favorite pieces. It was my first poetry video, my first facebook poetry note and the first poem I ever read in public.



Homecoming (Forever begins) by Chiedu Ifeozo

You can also find it on facebook here

I've got a feeling

I've got a feeling